Just about everyone—chronicbabes, chronicdudes, healthy folk—struggles with asking for help. It’s not the easiest to get vulnerable, and sometimes we don’t want to feel like a burden.

But we live in communities for a reason: so we can coexist and help each other. Seriously. So you’ve gotta ask for help, babe. In today’s video, I’ve got three tips to help you be a better asker-for-helper. watch it now.

*AWAP = As Well As Possible

Now it’s your turn:

Do you have trouble asking for help? What has worked for you in the past? Share your experience in the comments below.

Want more #AWAPwednesday? Check out our #AWAPwednesday video playlist, which has more than 100 videos packed with practical advice, lots of humor, and bloopers. Lots of bloopers.

Is there a question I can answer for YOU? Add it to the comments below, or shoot me an email.

Until we meet again: Be AWAP! Smooches!


(Loose) Transcript:

(reading from a scroll)

I need cake. I need a foot massage. I need a hoverboard. I need unlimited access to quilting fabric. I need more nail polish. I need a green smoothie, like, STAT. I need a bigger closet. I need my tomatoes to get ripe. I need all the cash. I need a thousand more wishes. I need candy.

Hi! I’m Jenni Grover Prokopy of ChronicBabe.com and today is AWAP Wednesday (that stands for As Well As Possible).

Each week, I offer you my personal favorite tips and techniques to help you craft an incredible life beyond illness. Yes! I know you can.

Subscribe to the ChronicBabe YouTube channel today to make sure you never miss another video, OK?

Why do we have trouble asking for what we need? So many people, not just ChronicBabes, have trouble asking others for help. For ChronicBabes, there’s a huge desire to be fiercely independent, to avoid feelings of inadequacy, or feeling like a burden.

I’m here to tell you that’s whack, babes. You’re allowed and encouraged to ask for help. You’re amazing, but you’re not Superwoman.

Be direct

Asking people for help sucks. But you gotta do it. Throw your hat in the ring and ask for what you need. Be direct: “I need help loading my groceries into my car” or “I need recommendations for a good babysitter.” You can even ask for help to ask for help: “I need help brainstorming how to ask my boss for more at-home work days.”

Don’t expect people to read your mind

Similarly, don’t assume your friends, family, and acquaintances know what you need. They aren’t mind readers and unless you tell them you need something–and exactly what it is you need–it probably won’t get done. And sitting around waiting for someone to realize you need something is not conducive to getting stuff done.

Unless you speak up and let others know how they can help, they won’t be helping in the way you need them to. Plus, mind reading is hands-down one of the worst superpowers to have so you don’t want your friends and family to be mind readers anyway!

Consider the medium

“I need help picking one of these three curtains on Pottery Barn. I’ve sent you the links, let me know what you think” is a great request for help to send over text. “I need help deciding if I should break up with my SO” is much better suited to an in-person heart-to-heart.

Know what requests you can send over text and what is better saved for in-person or a phone call. Consider that you can only use emojis in texting so “Bring me soup. [Soup emoji]” is a text-only request.

It’s not a sign of weakness to ask for help. Knowing what you need and asking for it is empowered and awesome, just like you.

Thanks for watching today! Do you have trouble asking for help? Have you developed strategies for overcoming this fear? I’d love to know. Share your strategy in the comments here or head on over to the blog at ChronicBabe.com to join the conversation—I want to hear what YOU have to say.

If you liked what you saw today, subscribe to our channel—and watch another one of my favorite videos right now. I think you’re gonna like it!
Until we meet again, be AWAP! Smooches!