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Home » Articles » Relationships
Doctor doctor, give me the news... are you any good?
by Rosalind Joffe, M. Ed. - CICoach
* from the Editrix: We just dig CICoach! Rosalind coaches people who live with a chronic illness or condition to stay employed and thrive in the workplace; her clients live with a wide range of chronic conditions, including: multiple sclerosis, scleroderma, ulcerative colitis or Crohn’s disease, spinal conditions, rheumatoid arthritis, epilepsy, diabetes, depression, and fibromyalgia, to name just a few. To learn more, check out CIcoach.com. And check out her new blog: Keep Working, Girlfriend!
You wouldn't hire someone to work for you based solely on a recommendation, would you? Hopefully, you'd interview the candidate with your expectations and needs in mind.
So, why isn't this true for an even more important decision – hiring your health care team?
Think about it. How do you choose a primary care doctor, specialist or physical therapist? Do you think about what you want and need from this relationship? Or do you rely on: "My doctor (friend, mother) said he has a good reputation"?
It's my experience that many people, especially those with chronic illness, feel deeply frustrated with their doctors. One reason for this is that they don't approach this as they would any other important "hiring" decision.
Living with several chronic illnesses, I've learned that it's up to me to find the right people who can help me help myself. It starts when I "interview" to see if it's a good fit - and continues if I leave when it's not. FYI – I've had four primary care physicians and seen more specialists than I can count over the last 30 years. When I looked at the web site for my current primary care practice, I suspected this group would be a great match for me. It is.
There are numerous issues to consider when choosing a health care professional, but you can start here:
- Has expertise and knowledge in the field.
- Displays caring, compassionate and non judgmental qualities.
- Views the doctor/patient relationship as a partnership.
- Shows openness to alternative opinions.
- Runs on time and responds to calls quickly.
- Will work as a team player with the rest of my health care team.
Here's a more simple list I heard from a chief of surgery. He says a doctor should be:
- Affable
- Available
- Able
I realize there are situations in which you don't have choices. That's why, just as with a new hire, it's up to you to make your expectations clear once the person is "on board." So, too, you can let a health care professional know how you work best and what you need from the relationship.
Does this feel too confrontational or assertive? Ask yourself: Does not making an active selection leave me continually dissatisfied? (If so, contact me about how I would work with you to develop your abiity to get what you need.)
Oh – one more thing, while we're on the subject of doctor-patient relationships. Do you minimize your symptoms to your doctor because you don't want her to think you're "complaining"? This can be a problem should you need a doctor's verification for a sick leave or an accommodation.
Rather than worrying that she'll see you as a complainer, give a concrete and accurate description of the physical problems you have at work. Describe how you get things done with your disability and make sure it's on paper. This paper trail of your history with disabling symptoms could be necessary if you ever need to make a case.
When you live with chronic illness, your doctor and other health care providers are key players in managing your health. It's not always easy, nor is it as difficult as it might seem for you to be an active partner in these relationships.
**Reprinted with permission from CIcoach.com.**
Posted: 12/23/2006 in Relationships
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