When we slip: Progress is not linear

by Jenni Prokopy, the Editrix

Progress is not linear. I've heard that at least a half dozen times from various health care professionals, but I'm always shocked when the truth of that simple statement is played out in my life.

I have slipped

Yup, I admit it. My exercise routine is out of whack, my eating has been funky, I haven't been going to bed at the same time every night (so I'm waking up at weird hours every morning), and I've been blowing off much of the relaxation techniques I usually rely on to keep me mellow.

Why? Stress.

So many things are happening right now, and it feels like a whirlwind in my little home office every day. Making significant changes in my business, traveling, planning multiple parties, entertaining out-of-town guests...all GOOD stressors, but stressors nonetheless. It feeld like every moment can potentially be filled with something to do - a bad scene for someone with fibromyalgia. "Go! Go! Go!" is not my usual M.O. I need downtime, people!

To top it off, I was just diagnosed with gastroesophageal reflux disease, and for the next month, I can't eat chocolate, fried foods, or spices of any kind--and I feel lost without hot sauce, spices and curries. So, trying to be a good girl and follow doctor's orders, I've been eating bland foods like bread, macaroni and cheese, and rice. But the bod is not happy with all those carbs, either. Waaaah!

The result? I'm anxious, frustrated, and tired. I'm sore all the time, and having headaches almost every day. The more I hurt, the less I do, the more stressed I feel about how crummy I feel, the more frustrated I get...you know the drill. It's that vicious cycle all over again.

And for a few days, I really beat myself up over this instance of slippage. Is this how a ChronicBabe behaves? After all the times I've counseled other women to take even better care of themselves during times of stress, why am I relaxing my own standards? Grrrr!

Cutting myself some slack

When I sit here and think about it, though, I see it's no good to beat myself up. That only serves to make me feel worse.

jenni So I'm frustrated and stressed - even a bit depressed. Not like I haven't been here before. And if I found my way out of it then, I can do it again.

So I slacked on relaxation exercises. This isn't the first time I stopped meditating, and the last time it only took a couple days to get back into rhythm. It's like riding a bicycle. That you don't pedal. That doesn't take you anywhere. Hmmm.

So I've been eating weird. Can you blame me? In a half-hour appointment, my entire diet was nixed and I had to scramble to find a new way to handle food. I did my best those first few days.

I could go on and on. Not that I'm shirking responsibility - because I know that I'm responsible for my every action - but it's not like I ran over someone or embezzled or cheated. I just had a little slippage. Progress is not linear, after all.

Starting today: the slow and steady path

This afternoon I realized I have to start taking baby steps to get back to where I was a few weeks ago - full-on Babe-dom - that place where I was eating well, sleeping eight hours a night, meditating, reaching out when I needed support, enjoying a sense of humor, working out every day, and approaching my growing business with enthusiasm and creativity.

So here, for all the online world to see, I am pledging to make these small steps over the next week and get myself back on track:

Hit the health food store and pick up lots of fresh foods that are healthy, easy to prepare, and tasty even without spices. There have to be a few, right?
Go to bed and wake up at the same time every day to re-synch my body clock.
Bust out my trusty Breathe Easy Deck and start meditating at least twice a day.
Get to the gym every day, even if it simply means a little stretching and a ten-minute walk - because just being in that environment motivates me.
Reaching out for support. (Um, I think this article covers that. Score!)
Write about my frustrations for at least a few minutes every day to get worries off my chest.
Create a list of daily, weekly, and monthly business goals so I stop worrying about every little thing at every moment. Also: get to work hiring an assistant who can take over some of the administrative tasks that are so draining.
Have some fun. Read a good book. Make a new piece of jewelry. Call a girlfriend. Watch Project Runway or Bridezillas. Listen obsessively to the new Justin Timberlake album. Laugh along with my friends who laugh at the fact that I'm obsessed with Justin Timberlake. Etc.

I've been here before, and I bet you have, too

This isn't the first time I've slipped back a little, and it probably won't be the last. And I bet that most of you have had this experience, too. So I hope that writing about my experience will also help you remember that you have tools to use to get back on the healing path after slipping. And of course, if you have tips for me (and other Babes) email them and I'll follow up with an article in the coming days.

OK - off to the health food store...

Posted: 9/18/2006 in Venting

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